Friday, June 1, 2012

Sweet Saturday Sample - June 2



I’m continuing this week with my WIP, Elly and the Geriatrics. Elly is living with her grandmother, helping her recover from an ankle injury; and Derek is the gardener at Sunset Acres, a mobile home community for senior citizens.

Derek has just introduced himself to Elly at the Sunset Acres rummage sale. After a brief conversation, he wandered to other tables in the recreation center. 

Derek wondered what had caused the woman—Elly—to blush. All he’d done was pick up one of those silly lace things stacked on the end of the table. What the heck were they for anyway? Then he remembered seeing the same doodads in his own Aunt Betsy’s parlor. As a kid he could barely move without knocking one of them to the floor. Did anybody still use them these days?
        He’d only come to the rummage sale today to support the old folks and to look for vintage fishing lures among the dreck. No luck on the lures. Not today.
        A vision of Elly’s soft red hair and brown eyes sprang to his mind.
        Well, I did find one treasure. An attractive woman.
        The sound of his name brought Derek out of his reverie. He turned to see Mrs. Lipscomb approaching, waving to get his attention. That morning he’d noticed the wisteria outside her trailer needed pruning, and he imagined she wanted gardening advice. He hoped she wouldn't try to do it herself.
        He pushed aside thoughts of the redhead, smiled, and walked toward the waiting woman. 


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19 comments:

  1. Love the male point of view on the "doodads," which made me chuckle. That sounds like a male reaction!

    You've totally captured my interest again...can't wait to see the next installment.

    Here's MY SWEET SATURDAY SAMPLE

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    1. Thank you, Laurel. I'm glad his reaction feels real to you and gave you a laugh.

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  2. I did find one treasure. Love that line.

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  3. I love his voice. The hunt for fishing lures and the "silly lace things" - dead-on for a man! And now he's thinking of Elly, which is just *perfect*. This is a great story!

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    1. Thanks for the compliments! I'm enjoying putting this story together.

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  4. Yeah, I love that line too, Elaine, and his concern that Mrs. Lipscomb wouldn't try to clip her plants on her own.

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    1. I'm trying to show that Derek is a good guy. Glad you picked up on that!

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  5. LOL doodad? Such a guy's way to describe a doily!

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    1. I was hoping that term sounded authentic! Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment.

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  6. Sandy,
    I'm enjoying the snippets of your story. I hope you keep going until it's a full book. I like your characters--all good poeple!

    Micki

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    1. Thank you, Micki. Of course, some bad stuff has to happen or it would be too boring!

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  7. I love the interesting characters in this one. :)

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    1. Good! That's what I intended. Of course, he's not perfect ....

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  9. I also like Derek, and his thoughts on doilies.

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